Funny Alcohol Quotes

Generally, people have very bad impression towards alcohol because of its harmful effects. Alcohol generally creates a sense of euphoria in your body. It affects your vocabulary, thinking capacity, and causes your mental and physical ability to lower down.  If you are going through a mental breakdown sometimes consuming alcohol may help you to get over the stress but that would be a temporary phenomenon. People are still in a dilemma if they want to go for alcohol consumption or against it while some people enjoy with the aftermath that happens after alcohol consumption. You will get many funny alcohol quotes which will show you the glimpse of fun that happens after an alcohol party. There are tons of funny alcohol quotes, wine quote, beer, rum, whisky and many more drinking alcohol sayings on the internet. You can copy them and repost in your status or you can also share them with your friends so that you can have some laugh over the drink.

 

Funny Alcohol Quotes, Sayings, Slogans & Status, Hilarious Jokes for Drinkers

Funny Alcohol Quotes

 

1. It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can’t remember if it’s the thirteenth or the fourteenth. – George Burns

2. Alcohol doesn’t make you fat, it makes you lean… against tables, chairs and walls.

3. I don’t have a drinking problem, I have thirst problem.

4. I started thinking about the dangers of drinking. After that, I decided to stop thinking.

5. “Alcohol may be man’s worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.”? Frank Sinatra.

6. “They speak of my drinking, but never think of my thirst.” – Scottish Proverb

7. “Everybody should believe in something; I believe I’ll have another drink.”– Anon

8. “The problem with some people is that when they aren’t drunk they’re sober.”- – William Butler Yeats

9. When girls express their feeling its risky,When boys express their feelins it’s Whiskey- Ketan sharma.

10. Good girls are made of sugar and Ice….But me and my girls are made of Whiskey and Ice.- Ribel

11. I’m not an alcoholic,just have a lot of reason to Celebrate.

12. I can’t afford vacation,So i am just going to drink until i don’t know where i am.

13. Don’t forget that Alcohol helps to remove the Stress,The BRA,The PANTIES and many other problems.

14. Ofcourse size matters,that is the only reason i do not prefer a small glass.

15. Ever notice how some people talk louder when they drink.?That’s why alcohol content is listed by volume.

16. I have applied for a loan but received negative feedback from the bank. They didn’t like the goal of the loan – to get drunk in Maldives

17. My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror. ~Rodney Dangerfield

18. Everyone who drinks is not a poet. Some of us drink because we’re not poets. ~Dudley Moore in the movie “Arthur”

19. One martini is all right. Two are too many, and three are not enough. ~James Thurber

20. I drink when I have occasion, and sometimes when I have no occasion. ~Miguel de Cervantes

21. I feel sorry for people who don’t drink. When they wake up in the morning, that’s as good as they’re going to feel all day. ~Dean Martin

22. I’m not an alcoholic. Alcoholics need a drink, but I already have one.

23. Alcohol makes people do things they know they shouldn’t but kinda want to. E.g I started sleeping 20 hours a day.

24. If you see me with a water bottle, there’s probably vodka in it

25. One day I shall solve my problems with maturity. Today, however, it will be alcohol.

26. Alcohol not only expands the blood vessels but also communications.

27. “In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is Freedom, in water there is bacteria.” ? Benjamin Franklin

28. Whoever drinks beer, is quick to sleep; whoever sleeps long, does not sin; whoever does not sin, enters Heaven! Thus, let us drink!” ? Martin Luther ,

 

For MoreFunny Sayings About Life

 

29. “A drunk man’s words are a sober man’s thoughts.”~ Steve Fergosi

30. “24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?”~ Steven Wright

31. “Drink what you want; drink what you’re able. If you are drinking with me, you’ll be under the table.”~ Anonymous

32. “Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.”~ Benjamin Franklin

33. “Everybody should believe in something; I believe I’ll have another drink.”~ Anonymous

34. Alcohol is for people,who can afford to lose some brain cells- charlie sheen

35. Alcohol doesn’t solve any problem but yet again,neither does milk.

36. I would date you, but my heart already belongs to Johnny Walker -Anonymous

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